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Executive Education, Personal and Professional development Programmes
New Cycles - Resolutions and Reflections
Bella Enahoro
New cycles are always interesting – the 'now and then' of our lives. Sometimes we recognise our cycles, sometimes they creep up on us and sometimes they happen behind our backs, almost as a by-product of how we've been living. Moving into the New year is a calendar-driven new cycle, which may or may not coincide with a new cycle emerging within our lives. And because this cycle is calendar-driven as opposed to internally driven, things may fall apart before the end of the month.
New year resolutions are not a great thing in my life because for me trying to impose a change in my life had never worked, so I quite simply no longer do it. But I do take the new year to evaluate the past and determine if I'm living the way I truly desire. If the answer is 'no', then the question is what am I going to do with it? Another reason I do not go in for new year resolutions is that when they slide, I then go into the remaining year with a chronic low-grade feeling of having let myself down. Never a good way to go into the rest of the year.
Why would we want to go into any year with the underlying feeling of having let ourselves down? Likely, we are not aware of what we're doing, we may not be aware of the negative impact of carrying that low-grade feeling of disappointment and failure within ourselves. We have a slight acknowledged feeling of losing faith in ourselves which may lead us to not trust ourselves. What do we do about it?
We laugh it off as unimportant, we may even expect it to 'peter out'. But what does that mean? Does that mean we expect a certain level of self-distrust, self-disappointment? We even joke with friends and family about how we've let go of our resolutions. e.g. I really must change jobs, stop smoking, lose weight etc but what the 'heck'.
And then there are those resolutions we admit only to ourselves, which at some level we know means we have to really grow out of them and grow into someone else e.g. suppose we decide to give up overeating – at a certain level it means we have decided to deal with our emotions in a different way. We know that overeating does not solve the problem and in fact creates more issues for us to deal with. Maybe we've decided we are no longer going to get drawn into family 'drama'. Which means we have to grow out of being triggered by things others do and say within the family.
What would happen if we let go of making resolutions? At New Year's we could acknowledge the sense that we can step outside of the normal flow of time as we have been living it and use a creative and visionary source within us, to shape the world afresh. We might allow ourselves to have a gentler way of evolving; a way that leaves no residue of disappointment or failure.
To think about the oncoming year, let me leave you with these 10 questions to reflect upon – courtesy of Michael Neill (http://www.supercoach.com/)
If we take time to reflect on these questions, a sifting and ordering process emerges and we can let go of the things are no longer working for us. As Marianne Williamson observes this year will bring whatever this year brings, but what we bring TO it will make all the difference.
Copyright ©Bella Enahoro Jan 2012
For more articles go to more.
New year resolutions are not a great thing in my life because for me trying to impose a change in my life had never worked, so I quite simply no longer do it. But I do take the new year to evaluate the past and determine if I'm living the way I truly desire. If the answer is 'no', then the question is what am I going to do with it? Another reason I do not go in for new year resolutions is that when they slide, I then go into the remaining year with a chronic low-grade feeling of having let myself down. Never a good way to go into the rest of the year.
Why would we want to go into any year with the underlying feeling of having let ourselves down? Likely, we are not aware of what we're doing, we may not be aware of the negative impact of carrying that low-grade feeling of disappointment and failure within ourselves. We have a slight acknowledged feeling of losing faith in ourselves which may lead us to not trust ourselves. What do we do about it?
We laugh it off as unimportant, we may even expect it to 'peter out'. But what does that mean? Does that mean we expect a certain level of self-distrust, self-disappointment? We even joke with friends and family about how we've let go of our resolutions. e.g. I really must change jobs, stop smoking, lose weight etc but what the 'heck'.
And then there are those resolutions we admit only to ourselves, which at some level we know means we have to really grow out of them and grow into someone else e.g. suppose we decide to give up overeating – at a certain level it means we have decided to deal with our emotions in a different way. We know that overeating does not solve the problem and in fact creates more issues for us to deal with. Maybe we've decided we are no longer going to get drawn into family 'drama'. Which means we have to grow out of being triggered by things others do and say within the family.
What would happen if we let go of making resolutions? At New Year's we could acknowledge the sense that we can step outside of the normal flow of time as we have been living it and use a creative and visionary source within us, to shape the world afresh. We might allow ourselves to have a gentler way of evolving; a way that leaves no residue of disappointment or failure.
To think about the oncoming year, let me leave you with these 10 questions to reflect upon – courtesy of Michael Neill (http://www.supercoach.com/)
- How do I want to live this year?
- What tangible results do I want to experience this year?
- Which feelings do I want more of this year?
- What impact do I want to have on the world this year?
- What is it I want to have this year?
- Who would I like to be this year?
- What are some of my pipe dreams?
- What do I want to make my life about this year?
- What would I welcome into my life this year?
- What would I love to create from nothing?
If we take time to reflect on these questions, a sifting and ordering process emerges and we can let go of the things are no longer working for us. As Marianne Williamson observes this year will bring whatever this year brings, but what we bring TO it will make all the difference.
Copyright ©Bella Enahoro Jan 2012
For more articles go to more.
